How not to make mistakes
Vol 16 Embarrassing spelling
In school, projects are a vehicle for the teacher to catch up on her marking, lesson planning, record keeping and so on right? So, you, a thirtieth of her class, get to work on choosing and producing your project during the next four or five lessons collecting coins, photos, rocks, Bubblegum Batman cards and whatnot before finally presenting it to your teacher or, in once-in-a-junior-school lifetime, a triumphant troll round all the other classes with the winning project clutched smugly to your tank top.
Once, my other classmates picking simple projects such as stamps of the world, I crazily selected Galileo.
Anyhow, on this occasion, it was LIONS that caught my imagination and I diligently set to work cutting out pictures, doing drawings and writing out page after page of lively lion anecdotes.
When the presentation day arrived, surprisingly smirking, the mini-skirted Miss Sinnot pored over it before announcing,
“Well done Wendy, take it round the classrooms and show it to all the other teachers.”
Wow, putting aside a slight consternation, an unexpected but delightful result.
Mrs Cooper read it with ill stifled chuckling “ha ha … all gathered … lying down together … ha ha frolicking in the sun … met in a parting in full view of their prey ho ho” as did Miss Gough in similar fashion to my confusion and increasingly bewildered shame.
“Oh Wendy!” snorted Mrs Mercer, a little unkindly I felt, ”keep an eye on your spelling lovey.”
Mrs Davies was more specific.
“Did you really mean to put LOINS?”
Arriving home breathless, I demanded instantly of my mother the exact meaning of ‘loins’ and two things happened.
1. My humiliation was complete and
2. I resolved forthwith to pay extremely close attention to the precise arrangement of letters.